Jakob Lodouche

Slow News Days

Wed, 02 Jul 2008 19:57:37 -0400

Well, seeing as Lodwick has suspended his tumblelogging et al despite reportedly “desperately needing to socialize on the Web,” it’s going to be slow going for Jakob Lodouche for a while. I’ll be holding out on taking a similar exit from Internet as I have about enough faith in Lodwick staying away from Tumblr as I have for Robert Downey Jr. staying away from coke. So when Lodwick inevitably comes crawling back looking for attention like a three-year-old whose mother is ignoring his temper tantrum, I’ll be here. Until then…

FCC wants a magic, porn-free wireless Internet

Thu, 26 Jun 2008 18:12:01 -0400

FCC wants a magic, porn-free wireless Internet:

timdreyer:

Shared by tim dreyer
pure stupidity…..
David Weinberger writes, “The FCC is suggesting that it will make a slice of spectrum available for free Internet access to users, so long as the providers…

LodWeb will not be this.

(I am going to hell.)

Thu, 26 Jun 2008 18:05:08 -0400

seagull:

How fucking dare anyone out there make fun of Jakob after all he has been through!

He lost his job, he went through a break-up. He was made fun of on the internet.

All you people care about is readers and making money off of him!

HE’S A HUMAN!

What you don’t realize is that Jakob is giving you all this traffic and all you do is write a bunch of crap about him.

All you people want is MORE! MORE MORE MORE MORE!
LEAVE HIM ALONE! You are lucky he even wrote for you BASTARDS!
LEAVE JAKOB ALONE!…..Please.

Gawker talked about professionalism and said if Jakob was a professional he wouldn’t have been a douche bag.

Speaking of professionalism, when is it professional to publicly bash someone who is going through a hard time?

Leave Jakob alone! Please!
Leave Jakob Lodwick alone!…right now!….I mean it!

Anyone that has a problem with him you deal with me, because he is not well right now.

LEAVE HIM ALONE!

Immaculate.

Lodwick Announces LodWeb 3.0

Thu, 26 Jun 2008 17:20:00 -0400

Dear The Internet,

I closed my blog on June 26, 2008. I could no longer handle the relentless, vicious, public attacks from a digital lynch mob towards the personality traits I have no intention of changing, such as my curiosity and my self-confidence.

If the Web is to flourish, we cannot count on the good will of the public. The combination of anonymity and universal access means no individual can fully feel safe opening up. The Web itself (the technology) has a vast and unrealized potential. Until we create fundamentally new types of Web sites which value privacy on a fundamental level, the web risks collapsing into a cesspool of YouTube comments and ad-based gossip-hate sites.

When I say “privacy”, I mean in the sense of private property, as in, “No Trespassing”.

I am walking away from what might be called The Social Web. This comprises any site where ‘anyone can sign up’ and electronically socialize with one another. The story is the same with most of these sites: a few settlers discover it and make themselves at home, enjoying the solitude. Increasingly, less-adventurous people find their way to the site. The population begins to snowball. A vocal minority of thoughtless jerks begin to speak up, driving away the settlers. In the worst case, the result is something like MySpace.

I have been an active participant in The Social Web since the 1990s and now it is time for me to leave. I desperately need to socialize on the Web, but the right tools do not exist yet. I now intend to start building them.

If you’re interested in following my progress, keep an eye on JakobLodwick.com. I will simply post stuff there.

Sincerely,

Jakob Lodwick

via Jakob Lodwick

In summary, Lodwick the Elite has denounced the social web as a world where mob rule runs wild and consequently, nothing good can ever come of it. So in the good name of Internet, Lodwick has taken it upon himself to reforge the web into a walled garden of sorts where presumably only those who delight the oligarchs of his new web can exist.

Remember people, Lodwick is a millionaire so he can rebuild the Internet. He has the ego. He has the entrepreneurial prowess to make the world’s first oligarchal web. LodWeb 3.0 will be that network. Better than it was before. More bullshit, fewer voices, more narcissism. LodWeb will know better than you.

Scathing words from the Ivory Tower of Lodwick. World’s...

Thu, 26 Jun 2008 16:48:44 -0400

Scathing words from the Ivory Tower of Lodwick.

World’s Saddest Millionaire Quits Internet - Gawker

"I will no longer hand loaded guns to thugs."

Thu, 26 Jun 2008 16:45:40 -0400

“I will no longer hand loaded guns to thugs.”

- Lodwick

Archive of Jakob Lodwick’s Tumblelog: Back. (c. Feb 26)

There will be irony.

"[…] my not understanding why such a smart clearly talented man would post a photo of pot and..."

Thu, 26 Jun 2008 16:41:17 -0400

“[…] my not understanding why such a smart clearly talented man would post a photo of pot and publicly thank himself for sending traffic to people who took the time/effort/thought to answer a public question.
Obviously, they respected you enough to answer your question, so why not respect them enough to simply thank them and not thank yourself for featuring their replies?”

- adventures of mascarah.: Dear Jakob,

"There is a huge difference between an honest, self-aware examination of your strengths and..."

Thu, 26 Jun 2008 16:37:56 -0400

“There is a huge difference between an honest, self-aware examination of your strengths and weaknesses, and an arrogant, holier-than thou smugness. People criticized you for the latter. For instance, it was incredibly smug when you said “Enjoy the traffic” or whatever — you clearly take yourself very seriously, which isn’t a good quality for a leader.”

- Jessicagoldharalson

all that glitters: End of a Tumblr Era

nikography: okay okay, i hopped on the rip-lodwick-a-new-one...

Thu, 26 Jun 2008 16:30:35 -0400

nikography:

okay okay, i hopped on the rip-lodwick-a-new-one wagon. i can’t help it. he is a lot of things that are wrong with humanity. apparently he’s leaving the internet today, so hopefully we can all resume being awesome again and i won’t have to see his crap make its way to my dashboard.

also, to maintain lodwick-integrity, here is a screenshot of his post with my commentary written all over it. view it larger.

Thank you, Nik, for putting things into perspective. Perhaps by some chance Lodwick will see this and have a better understanding of why so many people view him as a condescending douche.

vidar: YOU’RE UGLY. TAKE THE HINT. Pretty sure he did - many...

Thu, 26 Jun 2008 16:10:08 -0400

vidar:

YOU’RE UGLY. TAKE THE HINT.

Pretty sure he did - many times over.

Jakob quits the internet. Fin.

Thu, 26 Jun 2008 14:50:30 -0400

Jakob quits the internet.

Fin.

jakoblodwick: brianvan: kylebunch: nudawn: blakeley: One...

Wed, 25 Jun 2008 00:19:46 -0400

jakoblodwick:

brianvan:

kylebunch:

nudawn:

blakeley:

One image Lodwick will never reblog but I hope you will.

ROFLMFAO

staring at the sun

Zach Klein took this photo one fine day in 2005.

I will regret it for the rest of my life.

There is absolutely nothing to add. The picture says more than I ever could.

Control Self

Tue, 24 Jun 2008 11:01:00 -0400

jakoblodwick:

My worst problems are caused by conflicts of schedule. There are too few hours each day to do everything I want to do.

My energy is finite. If I waste it on the things I want to do, I will be unable to channel it into the things I need to do. In my life, the realm of “want” is mostly one habit: browsing the web. The realm of “need” is inventing companies that change the world.

I cannot do what I need to if I do not control this habit.

Extended: “Unfortunately I have the maturity of a 15-year-old, so I spend all of my time on shit like porn and ripping off other people’s ideas and posting them as my own and that leaves me zero time to invent a company that will change the world. For this reason, I settle for piggybacking the successes of others instead. It leaves more time for pot smoking and narcissism.”

Help me understand: "China"

Tue, 24 Jun 2008 02:28:41 -0400

jakoblodwick:

Can you explain the political situation in China in three sentences?

Is your attention span for such deep and involved topics so short?

Barack Obama, marketing genius

Mon, 23 Jun 2008 15:51:19 -0400

seagull:

jakoblodwick:

The man is telling you exactly what you want to hear.

Tell that to Republicans.

Yes. Also, Lodwick must be thinking of Bush and evangelicals. It’s alright that he hasn’t quite got his shit straight - remember he’s got his day planned out and his plans don’t involve mental clarity or anything worthwhile.

jakoblodwick: When I look at this photo, I think about past...

Mon, 23 Jun 2008 15:16:00 -0400

jakoblodwick:

When I look at this photo, I think about past America. I look at the cars and think, “Henry Ford”. I look at the skyscrapers and think, “Chicago”. I think about the camera that took the photo and I think, “George Eastman”.

A moment later, I am reminded of the substance which allows a country like the UAE to enjoy the spoils of our freedom. The substance that powers our country; the substance that should no longer power our country, but will continue to, because our country has lost the capacity to innovate.

Present America is a bureaucracy. Our corporations and our government function as a single entity, asphyxiating us. Almost nobody can get anything done. We have lost the means of pursuing happiness.

There is a tiny exception to this rule. The Entrepreneurs. The men and women who look America in the eye and say, “No! Like this.”

Photo of Dubai via aja. More here.

Yes, entrepreneurs like Lodwick who put so much funding into meaningful pursuits and alternative energy.

And not fueling demand for products that produce drug wars in South America. Yup, looks like Lodwick’s got this whole entrepreneurial thing down and has got his investments all figured out. Wonder what his return is.

Stricken from the interview: “So you want to know who my...

Thu, 12 Jun 2008 14:53:17 -0400

Stricken from the interview:

“So you want to know who my best customer is? Well, I won’t give away any specifics, but I will say that he’s a fake internet celebrity, he makes a habit of riding ideas that aren’t his to success, and he’s really into scat.”

jakoblodwick:

“To the caller, when I first answer, I am the inanimate Barbie. They do not know what I look like, who I am or how I feel. They can only imagine. It is my job to indulge their fantasies, to convince them that I am not a doll. I am their dream turned real. I view every question the caller asks me as a command for me to transform. If they ask if I am blonde, I become a blonde. If they ask how wet I am, I tell them that my panties are drenched. I respond to every sound the caller makes with an affirmation, I encourage them, I breathe life into their fantasy, I carve the doll out of flesh. I do not view myself as this doll, as the commodity. I am the manufacturer who creates her from the blueprint that the caller provides me. When the caller comes, it is positive feedback. Like an architect patting his contractor on the back.”

Photos of phone sex operators, via kottke.

Seriously, who’s douchey enough to be listed as “in...

Mon, 09 Jun 2008 19:22:17 -0400

Seriously, who’s douchey enough to be listed as “in an open relationship”? Guys that fuck around on their girls and Jakob Lodwick, that’s who.

doingitwrong: jakoblodwick: It’s true. I’ve been working on my...

Mon, 09 Jun 2008 19:08:58 -0400

doingitwrong:

jakoblodwick:

It’s true. I’ve been working on my ability to be present. It helps to remind myself that there is no way to fully capture a live experience. You can take a picture or video, but that record is a record. There is no duplicating the present moment.

Way to kill the conversation. Reblog, motherfucker: do you use it?

Dear Jakob

Mon, 09 Jun 2008 19:08:07 -0400

nostrich:

I’ve noticed something strange afoot on Jakob Lodwick’s tumblelog of late. Instead of continuing the conversation, he’s been taking it, and starting his own. What I mean by that is, instead of reblogging something he wishes to respond to, he takes a screenshot and makes a new post with his commentary.

Here’s one example, and here’s another. Fuck it, here’s another (potentially unsafe for work viewing, containing as it does sideboob of the most delicious order).

Ordinarily, I don’t care enough to take public objection to a person’s tumblelogging style, because everyone has their own way, and mostly, they’re welcome to it. But what Lodwick is doing is kind of an asshole thing to do.

For one: it breaks the reblog trail. As noted above, it doesn’t add to the conversation, it starts it anew with his name at the top of the chain. It also means no link for whoever it is he’s screenshotting — I think most people will agree that if there’s no link, the chances of figuring out the URL manually are severely depreciated. Which is really a roundabout way of saying no credit for the original author, aside from an image (that isn’t guaranteed to even always be there).

It’s pretty rude, as it goes.

So now I come to “why?” Sometimes he’ll deign to hand out a reblog for some lucky peon, and sometimes he won’t. There is no appreciable pattern to it.

So whatta you say, Lodwick? What the fuck are you doing?

I don’t expect a reblog, since I’m not internet famous, a musician, or a New Yorker, but maybe at least a screenshot with some commentary? I promise I won’t tell anyone you lowered yourself to responding to some nobody, I’m just curious.

(See here for the abridged version of this post, by another (anonymous) user that takes issue with this.)